I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize