Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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