i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I love you.
Bad choice
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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