Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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