Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize