Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
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