he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
