Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
