My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize
