i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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