If i come over, it means nothing
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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