If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
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