College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
