im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize