This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
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