i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
