I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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