I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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