i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
