and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
