Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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