just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
