shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I looked at my own cervix.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
