i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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