Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
