Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize