Sponge bath it is.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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