apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
