How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
