I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i just google imaged poop.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize