The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
