just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
