Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
