just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
