I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
