theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
My vagina just recognized that song.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
