The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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