508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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