Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Randomize