finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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