Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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