If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize
