member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
The struggles of a small town man whore
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize