he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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