Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
