fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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