she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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