Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
