i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize
