he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
